Hapax J. Legomenon

Hapax Jewforth Legomenon, most commonly known by his stage name Hapax J Legomenon is a Laigheach-Yakolirian singer-songwriter, rapper, actor and philanthropist.

Legomenon was born in Yakolira to parents of Laigheach extraction. He was a founding member of the band Giant Rooks, but left the band several minutes later over a dispute.

He was Laigheann's spokesperson at the Zendari Song Contest 11.

Hafacts

 * His favourite food is skinned eels, softboiled and smothered in white sauce.
 * He lives in a society.
 * He has the power to kill that 0.1% of bacteria that is left behind.
 * He'll fucking kill you.
 * His favourite past time is crossword puzzles.
 * He was directly responsible for the 2009 stock market crash due to insider trading.
 * He does not stan LOONA.
 * He was going to be charged by the state of Vendujo for crimes against humanity before the Laigheach goverment intervened.
 * He is qualified in law, jiu-jitsu and basic first aid.
 * He mains Marth in Super Smash Bros Ultimate.
 * He is a third cousin of Stewen.
 * His best friend is politician and known sex pest Mr Blobby.
 * In a radio interview, he revealed that he does not drink alcohol anymore.
 * He is absolutely not at all related in any way to Ted Loveday.
 * He has his own brand of perfume, "Eau de merde de chien".
 * His face is the front of shop.
 * He bites into ice creams with his front teeth.
 * He has reportedly seen God.
 * He has expressed his dislike of Emma Blackery on several occasions in the public media.
 * His bones are far too big to fit in the body of a child.
 * He once sold fake Juul pods.